Last Week Post

Things just happen for no reason. And nothing makes any sense.

I was thinking, I might just get my justice in the sweet end, for what? For this miserable, tawdry, pointless life I’ve lead myself into. No don’t sweat, give me a slack will you? I’m not being emo here. Hey honey, I am by the will of god a person of sense.

I’m here in Bicol now, one week vacation leave, which made me almost kiss the soil of this earth. Finally I was able to drag my ass back here in my hometown and kiss and hug (ugh) my mum and dad. I seriously thought I’d find peace of mind, well I guess you’re already fascinated with the fact that I didn’t get that peace of mind I’ve drooled over so much. Oh my god that’s awful. Right?

Okay, my ex boyfriend shows up in our doorstep with nothing to say except stare, get all doggy-eyes set and once in a while tried to suppress a tacky smile. That never ever helped anything; I was not at all moved. Oh well, but I get I moved on already. Yey!

Seriously, why do birds suddenly appear, every time he is near? Not!

-sudden inspiration cut short-

I'm Back

I'm back and I'm friggin' tired.

6AM a while ago I arrived in manila..

Need.To.Sleep

>.<

Bicol!

In just about 5 hours, I'll be finally going on board for my homecoming. Yey! Can't wait! I'll post my pictures as soon as I have them available...Yey! :)

Hello Bloodsucker...:)

Okay, I know of some people who got head-over-heels to this saga-made-movie, the no other than blockbuster hit Twilight. I never really knew what that movie was all about, when the promos aired, I thought (honestly, please don't laugh) that the movie is another version of "The Twilight Zone"..hahaha! Anyway, after all the screams and hisses have died, I finally decided to read the book. I always read before I critic the movie (HP, LOTR, Nicholas Spark's creations, etc). Then and there, I got hooked up, with the book though, not the movie. I've always been a bookworm and since I got this fever (literally), I had nothing else to do but stay in bed, prop up my laptop and read the ebooks I have in store. I admire the writer, Stephenie Meyer, for coming up with just the perfect blend of conversation lines for the characters, with a touch of romance, a hint of blatant criticism and direct to the point humor, which made the books so easy to read while at the same time, addictive to the brain. After the first book, I then I watched the movie, it was average, not very "bravo" level but it came up with at least half of my expectations, I've nothing against the characters chosen, I'm more of a substance observer. I believe the sequel is on the move, New Moon has been agreed by Summit Productions and will be filmed soon. I'll look out for that.:) I'm now on the third book and oh, Charlie is my fave male character, since he (creeps) insanely reminds me of my Dad and Alice is my fave femme character...no reason at all, she just seems so girly.. I like that.haha..Ciao!

ColorGenics - Unbelievably True

Got it from Vinness, I've highlighted those that are so unbelievably true..Creeps..Hahaha

Name: Ysh

Date: 1/14/2009

Colorgenics Number: 25463701


You are striving to make favourable impressions all of the time and you are going out of your way to make the impression that you are something special. You are constantly on the watch to see how your friends and neighbours are reacting to your various ploys. But this is so unnecessary because most of the time you are in control of the situation - and you are, in the nicest sense of the word, a 'manipulator' because you use various strategies very cleverly in order to influence and obtain the necessary recognition. >>hahaha! Love it!

For some time now you have been feeling rather insecure. You are looking for - and needing - an environment that can offer you roots, stability and a position that will relieve you of excess tension and stress.

Everything seems to have gone wrong and the situation at this time is such that you are not quite sure which way to turn. So it would appear that you are 'holding back', re-consolidating your position and relinquishing all fun and games for the time being.

You refuse to relax or to give in and you are endeavouring to keep exhaustion and depression at bay by keeping active. You are experiencing a relationship or a situation which is not satisfactory but you feel powerless to change it. You have that 'need to be needed' but you do little to achieve the sense of belonging that you need. You try to disguise your feelings of insecurity and so you continue to resist this state of affairs - and as a consequence you are experiencing tension and stress. Your depression makes you irritable and impatient. You have that urge to get away from the situation, either actually or mentally. You are finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate.

The stress that you are experiencing at this time is due to the present situation - a situation of your own making. But trying to ignore it, hoping that it will go away, will only aggravate it further. What you need to do is to slow down - to relax and re-think the situation and by going slow, you may be amazed to find that most of your problems will resolve themselves. >>see? I have nothing to do but relax and lay back.hehe

Want To Try It Yourself? Click HERE.

Sickly Ysh

I'm still sick. No medicine seems to working with my system. I terribly miss my team mates. :(

Since You've Been Gone

"But since you've been gone
I can breathe for the first time
Im so movin on
Yeah yeah
Thanks to you
Now I get 
I get what I want
Since you've been gone"

I sound Bitter. Shit. But then again, I don't care. Just like that and then we're gone, this is how it's supposed to be, this is how we're meant to end, this is how I'm supposed to be. Wishful thinking, make everything right. But no, I proved some things enough, rather you proved them, you are never worth it, you don't deserve me. My heart was true, but you chose to be a fool. Way too late now babe. I hate you.

"You had your chance you blew it
Out of sight, out of mind
Shut your mouth I just can't take it
Again and again and again and again"

I love this Song...

It's monday. I'm sick. I miss my bessy J, and I miss my station..tsk..:(

I'm engrossed with Shiny Toy Guns and their song Rainy Mondays, I just love this song..

---

I don't mind, you're someone that ain't mine
But someone that I'll get
And you don't know how hard I’ve tried
To convince myself that I can easily forget
But you let this feeling here inside me
One that never fails to find me

On a rainy Monday
I feel it inside me
Like the days of summer 
On a rainy Monday
I feel it inside me
In the hopes of one day...

I won't lie; I still can say that I 
Admit we went too far
And you won't see me change my mind
But I really wish that I
Could forget the way you are
But you let this feeling here inside me
The battle in my mind still fights me

On a rainy Monday
I feel it inside me
Like the days of summer 
On a rainy Monday
I feel it inside me
In the hopes of one day...

I can see that you're not beside me
But I still feel you shine inside of me

On a rainy Monday
I feel it inside me
Like the days of summer 
On a rainy Monday
I feel it inside me
In the hopes of one day... (2x)

Mystery

I'm sick.

I can barely breathe and my temples are throbbing like crazy. I sneeze every 10 seconds and wtf my eyes are all red and teary.

Shit happens so I don't care, I'm still gonna blabber...

I really am not the same me anymore, If you see my Friendster account, you might find the About Me section very different from what I see myself right now. I've changed, and sorry for me but it wasn't for any better. I want to be isolated right now, I am not in-love with Love anymore, I don't care anymore. To hell with that.:(

But this is making me feel weird, I for once and from the very start never thought that this phase of my life would come, I never thought I'm capable of pushing my loving and ideally perfect perception of love aside. But what do you know, it's too late.

I am reading the book Twilight, you know, the movie which recently made fanatics suddenly drool over blood and vampires. Hahaha. But see, I'm not an avid trend-follower, I don't dwell over what's new. I make it and do it my own way. So now I've decided to read the book first before watching the movie, which if I may mention, was soo yesterday. Lols

Going back...

In a week's time I'll be stepping my foot again to my hometown, again I will breathe the air that has nursed me for 22 years, again I will be seeing the people I have toiled life with and bitched with, and only God knows if I'll ever be able to change this current state that I'm in right now. I doubt it, I'm determined to stay this way for a while. No man can ever make this heart breathe for the moment, I am stuck in my own world where no one can hurt me again. Am I in the healing process? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe I'm gonna be like this for good. But who the hell knows what's gonna happen...

"Love is gone and my heart is a bird,
that has lost direction mid-flight."- Laura Ramirez

Ice Queen

Happy New Year!

This is kinda late and the season's air fleed already but then again, here I am typing these words without any recourse. I've spent my Christmas at the office with my friends, well, better laugh our hearts out with them crazy guys than spend it alone or just snooze in the bed. I spent my new year in a conference call with my two best buddies at work, Jen and Elah, it was fun though, but I still missed my mum. Sigh. I've once again changed, I'm defined, but at the end of it all...I'm undecided.

Sheesh, whatever happened to you Ysh? I feel like I can NEVER recall how to love again, I have people around me who blatantly slaps me in the face with their "i love you's" and all those cheesy, mushy stuffs. But I just can't take it like how the normal me would do. Gosh, have I become the ice queen?

Tell me Ysh, when will you melt?