Memoirs 0.9

I am trying so hard to surpass this phase of emotional roller-coaster ride that I've involved myself into for the past month. 

I cannot thank my twitter friends enough for tirelessly comforting me despite the distance and time differences *shout out to you besh Carmi!* 

I am pretending. I know I say that I'm finally okay but deep in the dark corners of my heart, I hide the tears and the pain. 

I mean, realistically speaking. Nobody moves on in 5 days. 

God I miss him. So much. But I engage myself in different things just so I can forget how wonderful it is to think of him every hour of every day. I need to do this. I need to make this work. 

My tears are dried up and my heart is learning the art of letting go. Eventually everything will be brand new. Soon, I will be free again. 

But this crack, this piece in my broken heart that he took, will never be the same again. Along with it are memories of me and all the colors that I've emitted with him and for him. I know so, he will never ever forget my existence. He will forever miss me just like how I'm missing him right now, it hurts. 

Soon.

"Tuloy parin ang awit ng buhay ko, magbago man ang hugis ng puso mo.."

Goodnight, Ysh. You will be fine.

~Y

11.2.15